“It’s your reaction to adversity, not adversity itself, that determines how your life’s story will develop.”
― Dieter F. Uchtdorf
Who can predict what will happen tomorrow? No one! Unexpected things can happen in life at any time. Adversities are to be expected in life and what you need to remember is that nothing good in life comes without some effort or pain. As Terry Goodkind once said: “If the road is easy, you’re likely going the wrong way.”
Resilience is the ability to face adversities and misfortunes and bounce back from them. Unlike many other traits, it is not something handed down at birth. It is something achieved through upbringing and experience.
Advantages that resilient children have:
- They never give up in the face of adversities.
- They never lose hope.
- They can overcome any obstacle in the way to their goals.
- They believe they are in control of their lives and future and work to improve them.
- They remain positive that things will happen for the best.
- They can stand up and start again as many times as needed if they fail.
Your children are probably busy enjoying the holidays right now, but don’t forget to throw in these tips to teach them how to be resilient.
- Don’t do everything for them
When they are young, it is ok to pamper them and give in to all their wishes. But, once they grow older, train them to make reasonable demands. Let them understand that you will not be there to cater to all their needs, and they need to work on becoming self-sufficient.
Also, trying to solve their child’s problems is something that many parents do. They see it as protecting their beloved children. But, what they are doing is limiting their child’s ability to deal with adversities in the future. Some parents even ban children from learning to ride a bicycle in fear of them falling. But, in reality, only by falling repeatedly can one learn to ride. Adversities are like that too- they make a person able to fare the journey of life better.
- Show them by example
The best way to teach is by example. Growing up, children admire their parents and the adults they see around them. Seeing them be resilient and steadfast can encourage and instill a desire in their hearts to be like that too.
Make your children read about the lives of people that you think are admirable and worthy of respect. Reading their life experiences can have a positive impact on your children.
- Teach them self-reliance
Teach your children to believe in themselves. Never compare them to others and tell them that they shouldn’t do that either. Tell your children that you are proud of them and encourage them to have their own opinions on things.
Never make all their life decisions for them. Train your children to think for themselves and make informed decisions from a young age. Allow them room to make mistakes so that they can learn from them.
- Teach them to handle their feelings better
Teach them to be honest about their feelings – to others as well as to themselves. Tell them it is totally fine to feel down or cry if they feel like it, that it is ok to express their feelings, and not to hold it all in. Tell them to ask for assistance when in need or if they are feeling down or afraid. You can show them how they can manage their anger, how to express their happiness, and deal with their sorrows. All these can help calm their minds and let them clear their heads. Nothing can help in facing adversity better than a clear mind.
Offer your children emotional support. Lend an ear when they need to talk and offer your shoulder if they want to lean on it. Make sure they understand that you are there for them at all times. This belief can empower them to bear any adversity.
- Teach them life skills
Teach your children life skills. They can help your children handle difficult situations. Teach them crisis management skills, first aid, basic repair, and survival skills. Teach them how not to panic and maintain a cool head in tense and unexpected situations. Sometimes these things you teach your children can be what saves their or someone else’s life.
- A healthy body and a healthy mind
You can only cultivate a resilient mind if your body is healthy too. So, tell your children to exercise daily and try meditation. Make sure they are eating their meals at regular times and getting enough sleep. Many of these small things can often have a major impact on our lives.
Also, teaching them to play a sport is a great way to cultivate resilience in children. Sports teach people how to set goals and work towards them, and dealing with wins and losses.
Teaching your children resilience does not mean leaving them to fend for themselves. It can only have the opposite effect. Instead, intervene as and when necessary. Your children need to have the belief that you have their backs at all times. We hope you find these pointers really helpful in raising your children to be resilient.
Adam Grant’s Advice for Raising Resilient Kids
Exam Smart Tips
Exam Smart Tip #1 – How to Encourage Our Kids to Speak Better?
Exam Smart Tip #2 – How to avoid carelessness?
Exam Smart Tip #3 – Establishing Routines!
Exam Smart Tip #4 – Let’s Read Carefully!
Exam Smart Tip #5 – Beating the Exam Fever!
Exam Smart Tip #6 – How to Eat Right for the Exams?
Exam Smart Tip #7 – How to Avoid a Meltdown?
Exam Smart Tip #8 – Taking Stress out of Tests
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